A Child Loaned

This is a beautiful poem sent to me by one of my friends,  very close to my heart, and I found this so apt at this moment of my life, that I am posting on my blog, I am not only inspired but also filled with gratitude for the privilege I had in taking care of my son for seven years of his life. I am thankful to my friend for her concern, thoughtfulness and above all for being a mirror for me. I continue my journey with gratitude.

A Child Loaned

I'll lend you for a little time

A child of Mine," He said,

"For you to love the while he lives,

And mourn for when he's dead.

It may be six or seven years

Or twenty-two or three,

But will you, till I call him back,

Take care of him for Me?

He'll bring his charms to gladden you,

And should his stay be brief,

You'll have his lovely memories

As solace for your grief.

I cannot promise he will stay,

Since all from earth return,

But there are lessons taught down there

I want this child to learn.

I've looked this wide world over

In My search for teachers true,

And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes,

I have selected you;

Now will you give him all your love,

Not think the labor vain,

Nor hate Me when I come to call

And take him back again?"

I fancied that I heard them say,

"Dear Lord, Thy will be done,

For all the joy Thy child shall bring,

The risk of grief we'll run.

We'll shelter him with tenderness,

We'll love him while we may,

And for the happiness we've known,

Forever grateful stay.

But should the angels call for him

Much sooner than we planned,

We'll brave the bitter grief that comes

And try to understand.

~ Edgar A. Guest

Have a grateful day !

This too shall pass ….

Yesterday was All Souls' Day.  I visited the graves of my family members who have died, my mother, my father, my sister and my grand parents. It's an important day for us in the family, where all of us go together to the cemetery. This time I went alone as it was difficult for all of us to go together.

While visiting the graves, I recalled an event exactly  a month ago. A little girl baby was born in our family, she was so beautiful, looked like an angel, but her life on earth was so short, that before I could hold her in my arms and kiss her, she left the earth. It was as if a sweet angel that came for a brief visit to the earth, and had to leave back to where it belonged.

This little girl was born in an emergency as its heart beat dropped and the doctors tried their best to save the child.   When I heard about the baby, I rushed to the hospital, and found the baby on the ventilator, a small little girl appeared as though sleeping peacefully, after which I met Mary, my sister in law, in the post operative ward. The moment she saw me, she broke down, I had no words to communicate, the grief was too much to bear. After a while the nurse brought a small little baby wrapped in a pink towel, and gave her to Mary to hold for some time. 

I can never forget that moment of grief - of a women who carried this same child for nine months, in her womb, and at the end of the term, had to hold a lifeless body of a child in her hands. She wept and wept inconsolably, I did not know what to do, I have never encountered a situation like this, I felt totally lost, and had no words to console. I was too shocked and felt extremely pained, all I could do was to silently stand by and hold her hands.

I am still in the process of coming out of this experience which was too deep. For the first time in my life, I carried a dead baby in my arms to bury – it was too much for me to take, I cried silently and handed over the baby to her father, who buried her.

The time stood still, death is an important reality, I have the experience of my sister who died young, my parents who died, it did affect me to some extent, but this experience of death was too sudden, unexpected that left me numb and shocked.

I have no words to console the mother of the child, who is in grief, it’s painful to see and difficult to handle – I feel helpless and in pain too.  But deep in my heart I believe that God knows what is best, and this too shall pass ……. This little angel who departed, had given me opportunity to look at life at close quarters, and has challenged me with this question - if I were to leave the earth, what would I do now?  I am thinking and relooking at my life? Hopefully answering it in my heart, and making those changes which will improve the quality of my life.

Be a blessing !