I have chosen 26 Tips for a Happy Married Life as my theme for A-Z April challenge, 2016. Today the word is Nourish
Today I want to focus on nourishing the relationship in marital life; there are so many ways we can nourish our relationship. Some of the things I have learnt over a period of time, despite all challenges in married life is: creating space for meaningful conversation whenever possible, it is so easy to focus on what is required for the house and what needs to be done, constantly worried and caught up in the day to day life affairs; and at other times responding to the needs of the extended members of the family; or getting involved in activities that can take away a lot of time and energy.
I created the space for conversations that focus on the purpose of our life; what were our dreams and how are we responding to it now together as a couple. Our expectations, hopes and aspirations from our living together, our top priorities and how can we make our lives meaningful. These conversations have improved the quality of our lives and also have brought in harmony and balance.
We also learnt our favourite hobbies that brought us happiness and helped one another to nurture and encouraged by being with one another. I enjoy going out to the theatres and watching movies while David preferred to be happy with the television, but still he would accompany me to the theatre because I wanted to watch, and together we watch movies whenever possible and laugh together at the same jokes, and have conversations related to the movie.
Last few years we also made decision to go out for a short vacation; leaving our jobs aside and being away from the city for a week and doing nothing – taking a walk to the church, going to the sea shore in the evening hours and praying together.
David does not like outside food and always felt that its waste of money to go out and eat; and because of which we never went out except for some weddings and other celebrations. Recently he surprised by suggesting to eating out, thus giving me a break from the kitchen and cooking and being together to enjoy one meal away from the home.
At home there is always plenty of work which is never ending; David is very helpful and most of the time we do shared cooking – if he has to make a non vegetarian curry. I will be with him standing and cutting all the onions, tomatoes, cleaning washing the meat and help him in preparing the dish.
We take also a lot of preventive measures in order to be healthy; when I make some cinnamon drink. I share with David and if he is making green tea, it will be both of us. Some times our daughter too joins in for a cup J when I bring fruits like papaya, grapes and guava, I cut and we share and when he brings water melon, sappota and some dry fruits, he will cut and share with me and our daughter too..We keep reminding one another to go for health check-ups; and if needed we go together, recently I got all the important tests done. Motivated David also to take care of himself and the issues that he struggles with. So we mutually help each other to stay healthy.
We take time to renew ourselves spiritually by following our heart – I most of the time prefer to go for silent prayer and reflection. I enjoy either reading or listening spiritual gurus and love self help books, posts that inspire and motivate him. David on the other side is religious who likes to follow certain rituals and is very fond of saints and keeps listening to their stories and testimonies on the net. And when keep exchanging our knowledge and also share our spiritual experiences in life; which nourishes our soul too.
We have a great fascination to music that is uplifting, energizing, and melodious touching our hearts and filling us with happiness and joy. Every morning we listen to devotional songs of regional languages… I enjoy Christian devotional in Tamil and English. David will opt for Telugu and Hindi and we take turns to take time in the early hours to listen to the music which will be motivating and inspiring and it will feed our minds to stay positive throughout the day.
So we keep exploring and evolving new activities of sharing whatever gifts and talents we are blessed with to offer to the community we belong to; it could be in our small church community, or at our workplaces and sometimes even in the places we volunteer our time and energy. We help nourish one another in order to be active and healthy.
Be Healthy & Be Happy!!