courtesy Google |
Sonu (name changed) has completed her Msc final
exam and is so happy to get back to her native place; it was her dream to study
in a prestigious college at Hyderabad for two full years; now she is returning
back to her home town.
Sonu’s mother had come to pick
her up, and has been staying with her for the last 3 days. Their tickets are booked in advance, and it’s
time for Sonu to pack her bags and bid good bye to her friends. Her mother
being a great devotee of sarswathi, goes to the temple to thank the goddesses for
helping her daughter complete the exams, reaches the temple takes the
blessings, and returns to the room, only to find her daughter hanging from the
ceiling fan.
Not knowing what to do, she
cries and alerts those around her, and soon Sonu’s friends and her teachers
come to her help, police complain is made, and Sonu’s body was taken for post
mortem.
The post mortem revealed cuts and
bruises all over Sonu’s body, to prove that she had suicidal tendencies. The saddest part of the story is that Sonu’s
friends saw the cuts so many times at different parts of the body, so visible,
yet could not identify it was suicidal sign.
Sonu’s teachers too were
astounded at what had happened, and they found it difficult to accept the
reality. On further exploration, it was found that Sonu was in love with a boy
from her native town, and they always had something to fight about, every time,
she was disturbed, she tried to harm herself with whatever came in her hands,
some times it was knife, some time fork, and other times it was blade or
compass. Whenever her friends tried to ask her about the marks, she would lie
and give excuses of having fallen down, or something hit her, or she had an
accident etc.
Sonu’s mother
returned back heartbroken to their native town, without Sonu completely shattered,
the sorrow was so great, that she became totally unstable and had to be helped
to reach safely.
Suicide is
the most preventable form of death, and there is an Increasing rates of suicide,
every day. The first year intermediate results are out today at hyderabad, and these youngsters
unable to face family, out of fear and shame have resorted to suicide. Today’s news paper states almost 5 – 6 suicides
all of them aged 16 years. I was upset this morning, and decided to post on
this subject, which is becoming a burning issue.
It is said
that persons thinking about suicide almost always make their intentions
known. We do not want to talk about it, mainly because we are frightened, and
its fear and discomfort that keeps us from talking about it. Let us break the silence and spread the message to those around us, for we have a great role, in preventing suicides
by being the first line of defense against the most preventable form of death. So how do we identify persons with suicidal
tendencies, and what do we look for:
In general
look for verbal cues, wherein the
person says directly he/she is sick of life, wants to kill, or wishing to
death, these clues could be directly given or indirectly said.
Another
important clue is the behavioral clue,
wherein the persons is depressed, moody, acquires pills, poison, is on drugs/alcohol, sudden change in
the behaviour, is a sure sign to identify, something is wrong.
The third
most important clue is the situational
clues, wherein there is divorce in the family, suicide in the family,
losing a job, pet or a person, serious mental or physical illness are some of
the signs.
What can we do: Remember 3 simple a’s
- Ask - meaning ask the person whether he/she is thinking of suicide directly or indirectly. Get the person to talk about it, and you will find that there is a possibility of threat, and he/she is contemplating suicide...
- Appeal to the person to stay alive- Remember, suicide is not the problem, only the solution to a perceived insoluble problem
- Assist - Best Option: Have the person go IMMEDIATELY to the emergency room/hospital with some one else. Next Best Option: Have the person call and make an appointment with a counselor immediately after speaking with you. Third Option: Get a “good faith commitment” that they will call
Who can you call? In Hyderabad the following
numbers can be a
Sahayam, Osmania University’s Psychological counseling
centre 040-27682451. G Angela 8978191578
Dr Diana
Monteiro 90002-34262, Hyderabad Academy of Psychology: 32578899
Dr. Pragya
Rashmi 92474-32497
Sujata Raman
98480-43200
Asha Hospital
040-66752222
Makro Foundation
– 040 -46004600 .info@makrofoundation.org
Roshini Counseling centre -+91 40 6666 1117, +91 40 6666 1118
Let us Join hands to protect our youngsters
It is indeed tragic when somebody decides to end his/her life due to hopelessness, frustration, depression... and it is more devastating for the family and the friends who have to live with the fact that they could have helped or prevented the suicide.
ReplyDeleteThe 3 A's should be certainly used by everybody in case they see some suicidal symptoms in their near and dear ones.
A very apt post for the times today, G!
Thanks Shilpa ! it was very upsetting today for me to read the news paper, we are there in the campus, doing our bit, if everyone joins, a lot more can be done.
DeleteI have two school of thoughts on this.. One is that suicide is committed by those who have no courage to take on the obstacles that life throws at you and have no one to guide them through it either because they dont ask or they dont find the right person..
ReplyDeleteThe other is that I find them to be extremely brave since to give up ones own life is something I cant imagine. I love my life so much that it would take tremendous courage to give that up whether its at a crest or peak...
Good post !
PhenoMenon
http://capturedalive.wordpress.com/2013/04/22/stop/
True ! when the person does find the right person, and also they get caught so deep into their problem, they don't find a way out and in desperation they may give up.. and the other point is that it does require a LOT of courage to harm oneself, I get scared even of a hot wax falling from the candle, or sometimes, while cooking, i tend to move so far, lest the oil falls on me.. they want to put an end to the temporary problem in a permanent way. Thanks for your comment.
DeleteGood that you wrote abt this
ReplyDeleteI witnessed 2 -3 suicides in my own college
Suicide help lines are there now. I hope they are of some help. but a person shud call them to get the help first
Thats why it is very important for us to be aware of the clues they gives us. If we are able to identify the clues, atleast we can recommend them to take help, or direct them to a counseling centre, thanks for commenting.
DeleteI hv a v dear friend who has suicidal tendencies. luckily she's been saved everytime .... but it's so scary
ReplyDeleteIt is definitely scary, I had a student who would had suicidal tendencies, but with counseling and encouragement, he was able to come out of it totally. It is very important to let these people know, that we care, there are organizations and helplines that work exclusively for this.
DeleteA nice way to spread awareness through your blogs.
ReplyDeleteThanks, its been on my mind and the timing was perfect with the letter S. Now with the results on intermediate here, every day I am hearing, feel sad, happy to find a place to share !
DeleteA very informative topic.we shove many such issues under the carpet and pretend they dont exist. Your blog throws light on the reality.
ReplyDeleteNice to hear that, whatever it is we can't go on pretending, we must do something, in our culture we do not talk about these issues openly and fear that we may give ideas for youngsters, actually my talking about it, we help them, in dealing with these issues ! thanks for your comments, appreciate you !
DeleteInformative and earnest ! Thanks for sharing this :)
ReplyDeleteI am happy to know that ! appreciate your comments !
DeleteSuch an important topic. My aunt committed suicide last year because of an unhappy marriage. The worst part was the number of people she tried to reach out to.
ReplyDeleteHow sad, sorry to hear about this, wish she could have found someone to share, this is a preventable death.
DeleteHi Genevive, This is an important topic. I have known several people in my life who have made this sad choice. Awareness is essential. Teaching people how gratitude also can be applied to our individual lives to counter what can drag us down is something that is also helpful and something you are obviously seeking to do. God bless, Maria from Delight Directed Living
ReplyDeleteVery true ! counting the blessings of life, can keep any one happy, it is produces positive energy, grateful people are happy people, and they look for things to be thankful for, thanks for your input and i appreciate you for your comments !
DeleteThis sounded so horrific Angela and yet it is true . Perhaps , these youngsters were always giving out signals to be noticed and felt cheated that they could not be identified . Thank You for the helpline numbers ! They would help many a tormented soul ...
ReplyDeleteThanks and appreciate your comment, saw it now and thought its better late than never.
Delete