Today I woke up from a dream that
seemed so real. My whole body was shaken, my mind completely disturbed. My dream took me to a beautiful shrine,
wherein I had gone with my family. I
found myself sitting in the chapel, holding my children on either side.
I had come with great devotion,
my eyes closed and my heart open, praying devoutly, so engrossed that I forgot
about my children who were beside me. In
fact I was praying for them, for both my daughter and in a special way for my
son. I was aware of my daughter sitting quietly and Emmanuel on the other side
playing with my bag.
I completed my prayer, opened my
eyes and found only my daughter, and not my son. Emmanuel my son was missing. I
started looking around, frantically searching for him every where in the chapel;
I was unable to trace him. I did not know what to do.
I started running out of the chapel
crying and looking for him. I started
asking every person outside the chapel, describing him of his looks, the color
of his clothes for easy identification. But I did not succeed in finding him.
I continued to move around the
shrine, my heart pounding, my legs refusing to walk and I was almost shivering,
unsure of the path. I was walking like a
mad woman in the crowd. Where would Emmanuel have gone? What has happened to
him? I could not stop my tears; I have no words to describe my feelings. I felt
apart of me was lost, and there was only darkness, void and emptiness in my
life.
The thought of losing a child,
who has speech difficulties, is unbearable.
I could not control my thoughts. What if someone took him away? How
would he defend himself? How would he say if he is hungry or thirsty? Will he
be able to survive without me?
Oh God protect my son wherever he
is? I do not know what to do? Where to find him? Where is he? What has
happened? My thoughts are so frightening, for I have heard of stories where
children are kidnapped and made to beg, I heard of children being used for
menial jobs, some are taken into homes and made to do the domestic work.
A special child is more
vulnerable than the other children. My son! Would he ever be able to come out of abusive
and exploitative situations? Oh God
please do something? Who will bring me out of this misery, I have no way out?
I went searching everywhere, only
to come back disappointed. Tired, hungry, broken I return back to the shrine
thinking of my daughter who is waiting for me. Little girl sitting in the
chapel. Suddenly I gain strength
thinking of her, oh my God, what am I doing, left my little girl behind, in
search of my son. I started walking as
swiftly as I can towards the chapel.
I find my old friend on my way,
and tell her about my missing son. To my surprise she tells me that she saw
Emmanuel sitting right in the front row in the church smiling away. I could not believe my ears. My throat was
dry; voice would not come out and I was speechless. There was only tears’ just
flowing, to know that my son is fine and he is in the safest place.
I took courage and wiped my
tears, went inside the shrine, knelt and sat down in gratitude. Emmanuel was just standing in front of me
smiling away. I became aware of his presence. I was at peace as I closed my eyes; and I knew
he was very close to my heart. Now there was no fear, no worry, no anxiety but
peace and harmony alone. For I found him in the safest place, with the Lord, the
very source of life.
I am grateful & Happy!
Wow aunty amazing..... whenever I read any post with regards to Emanuel I get reminded of Abi(my love) who is no more. I just imagine Abi in place of Emmanuel. True there are no words that could express our pain of losing our loved ones. Even I just close my eyes and pray for him every time a tear drops from my eyes in remembrance of him. I only hope that he is the safest place. In the kingdom of the most high singing praises and honouring the almighty in union with all the angels, saints and Mamma Mary..... God bls u aunty.. Keep up this spirit aunty and so will I... Lets pray for those thousands of other people who are broken coz of losing some1 who completed their world....
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by ! I am happy to hear from you.
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